Thank you very much for the extensive explanation at HaneAtTheHeadFollowUp! I'm afraid you're probably right that I shouldn't expect to get sente in every situation. The reason I say "I'm afraid" is that a big motivation for my playing Go is that I try to learn from it for real life. One situation that I notice often is that, when I'm involved in a dispute, instinct pushes me towards beating a dead horse. I see that as the equivalent of missing a chance to tenuki, which is why I'm trying to become more aware of that.